The girl with a future avoids a man with a past.
A hamburger by any other name costs twice as much.
A husband is like a fire – he goes out when unattended.
Character is what you have left when you’ve lost everything you can lose.
Definition of a Statistician: A man who believes figures don’t lie, but admits than under analysis some of them won’t stand up either.
Housework is what a woman does that nobody notices unless she hasn’t done it.
America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week.
A signature always reveals a man’s character – and sometimes even his name.
The mint makes it first, it is up to you to make it last.
Zoo: An excellent place to study the habits of human beings.
Definition of Statistics: The science of producing unreliable facts from reliable figures.
Hope is tomorrow’s veneer over today’s disappointment.